Category Archives: Announcements

A Tribute to Mr Hendrick: Comedian, Nice Guy, Hero.

William Hendrick – “NY Johnny”s father – passed away unexpectedly last month and his loss is more than just the passing of someone I know’s dad. Mr Hendrick was a really great man and while lots of people already knew this and I’m sure have been saying so since hearing the sad news – there was another side to him that I feel personally compelled to make sure is recorded for history now that he sadly is no longer among us.

Mr Hendrick was a local politician in the town of Lynbrook Long Island for years before being appointed and then elected mayor and that was always cool to me but I never knew him as or saw him as a politician. My interactions with him were of course always as “Johnny’s dad” but I never thought of him as just a friends dad either. The most defining trait of Mr Hendrick, to me, was that he was one of the most on-point comedians I have ever known…

I was annoyed when I saw this photo – a dour gloomy expression – as the choice by Newsday to illustrate the announcement of his passing, as my memories of how opposite-from-that-depiction he was flooded my mind. Even the local Fios News report of his passing picked gloomy looking photos, which is a real shame because it doesn’t memorialize who or how he was as a person at all.

Mr Hendrick was uniquely humorous…. And he was the best kind of humorous. My preferred kind of comedic delivery. The kind that doesn’t try too hard because it actually doesn’t try at all and just exists because it has no choice. The kind of hilarious that can’t be stopped because it’s not the result of an effort to be jovial or jokey, but rather is just the natural combined result of a high octane mind in the face of the chaos and tragedy of existence that chooses to laugh instead of cry about it. It’s the sort of comical view about things that can only come from a good natured intelligence – a kind hearted nihilism that recognizes that everything either is, or is an opportunity to become, a joke. Not a joke in the traditional sense of a set-up with a punchline, but rather the much harder to do style of improvisational social commentary.

Mr Hendrick’s humor was biting, dry, sarcastic, and most of all: omnipresent. Every situation was an opportunity for comedic addition and there was no “off” button, no matter the context. The news reporter on TV, his sons attempting in earnest to deliver information to him (amidst him messing with them during their attempted delivery), the amount of clutter on the coffee table – all were taken as set-ups to a style of Directors DVD Commentary that was always funny. And that’s the thing – somehow, his gags always landed, and on the rare occasion of a bomb or zinger that didn’t quite make sense because it was ushered out of his mouth before having been fully fine-tuned – he would adeptly flip even that into a solidly constructed laugh line. That is the true trademark of not only a good comedian, but a sharp mind – and the best kind of one requires the other, in my opinion.

It’s times like these when I wish I could share clips of my memories to showcase these moments as examples so that they could be fully enjoyed to the extent that I enjoyed living through them. Like the time when Johnny and I returned home late and started moving our stuff from the living room, awaking Mr H who had fallen asleep on the couch in which within 1.2 seconds of him opening his eyes, asked me – in reference to my gigantic 17-inch Macbook Pro laptop (that they don’t even make anymore) – why I had “a fkking cafeteria tray for a computer”. That’s the kind of thing that makes me laugh even right now as I typed it because it’s just so quick. What dad isn’t angry at being woken up, let alone has a humorists state of mind at that time, let alone is able to conjure it in application to his surroundings within a moment of booting up his brain and pull a reference like that? Mr Hendricks, alone.

Self aware, and ever-conscious of his surroundings, Mr Hendrick unwittingly taught me more about comedy through example than any acting school could have. With most parents-of-friends, there are inevitable awkward moments or lulls in conversation during the filler time you spend with them before, after, or during the hang-out time with that friend – but not with Mr Hendrick. Not ever. Mr Hendrick preemptively sandblasted those moments with his trademark brand of engagement that was like a Standup doing crowd work to the point where I would not dread, not merely tolerate, but actually look forward to getting to talk with him. Whether we were talking about politics, movies, comic book character back-stories, or whether I was talking or arguing about those things with Johnny and Mr Hendrick was moderating the debate – he always had unique and clever additions to the topic. And it wasn’t because he was trying – it was just the natural way he flowed into conversation – A unique quality I’ll miss most. That engagement.
In my experience – Mr Hendrick would razz you, himself, his surroundings and his two sons about absolutely everything. Whether it was a direct shot fired or a mutter to himself, Bill Hendrick had a dry observation that owned the moment. It was awesome. But while no haircut or goofy outfit or misstatement or shared atmosphere was safe from his roasting, you absolutely never felt bad about it because it was never mean spirited. It was never cruel. Even when you were the target of the tease, Mr Hendrick never made you feel picked on and that wasn’t his intention. I admired this in particular about Mr Hendrick because he effortlessly achieved what I couldn’t at the time, and to many extents still haven’t mastered, in that effect. Where as I, even in my light hearted razzing of a person would often be taken as an attack – Mr Hendrick could straight up demolish you and you would actually feel good about it. More typical however was just the type of comedy he would interject into every situation. Whether it was something universally regarded as ridiculous, something none of us thought as ridiculous until his commentary, or something as mundane as the deli (or one of his sons) bagging the wrong type of bagels he wanted – Mr Hendrick had a way of adding a dry barb to the situation with just the right tone, comment, or sometimes just a Ralph Cramden/Honeymooners-esque reaction that got a point across, humanized the context, and challenged you while keeping things pleasant all at once.

And that was the kind of brain he had. The kind that cut through the superficialities of this existence and asked the real life questions on all true deep-thinkers minds – like – “Which cartoon sidekick could carry his own show as a spin-off?”. His choice was Patrick Star from Spongebob Squarepants – and he was totally wrong about that choice of course – but the fact that he even deliberated over the question is what matters. I argued with him (somewhat to poor Johnnys dismay as I think he tired of those kinds of mock-debates after the first 2 rounds, where as my tone deaf self would extend them to infinity) for at least an hour over why there was no way in hell Patrick Star could carry his own show and vigorously defended my own pick (from his list of choices) of Woodstock from Snoopy/Peanuts, stating that while Woodstock speaks in animated form only through squeaking, he could usher in a new era of non-dialog driven animation that had huge potential – far more than the lovable dope schtick that Patrick offers.

But Mr Hendrick, like a good attorney defending his client, delivered a thoughtful defense of Patrick Star because, as he said, he was the working class little guy who always tried in earnest, arguing that he wasn’t so much “dumb” as depicted but just operated on a different wavelength and was mostly misunderstood. I could assume that that’s a similar feeling he took to his politics, now that I think of it – not that his constituents were dopes like Patrick of course, but that even those who appear to be dopes have stories to tell and aren’t just the supporting characters on the sidelines of life but often are deeply misrepresented and unfairly ridiculed by the mainstream. Perhaps that is a stretch on my part, but I still think that those who knew him solely as a politician might find it of comforting interest that in a private moment, with no outsiders listening in, vigorously cross examining his sons friend over cartoon series feasibility – Mr Hendrick believed in the working class little guy and defended him – even in animated sea creature form – from the elites.

My specific dot-connection there, aside – In the respect of defending the little guy at large, the dude really was a hero. I was always observing clearer, less murky examples of this and always appreciated his diligence as it always seemed to be extra from what someone in his position might be expected to do or say or try. NY Johnny, whom many of you know is, and always has been a gifted artist, drew a portrait a decade ago representing his dad titled “unsung hero” and I remember thinking at the time that it was spot-on. *UPDATE: In the process of posting this piece, I saw that Johnny mentioned this in a most excellent eulogy to his father, recanting that title after seeing the hundreds of people who appreciated and loved his father turn out and say kind things about him, adding that he would addendum that title from “unsung hero” to simply “hero”, and I love that sentiment. But to continue with my previously written comments on that subject:

Mr Hendrick was an under-appreciated gem, not only from being a font of comedy but being a tirelessly good guy. Admiration of his high octane brain made me realize he went above and beyond in other areas of his life as well. and he didn’t need to. Middle aged, divorced, with two grown up kids starting their own lives, and a government job – no one would have blamed him for doing or being less. He could have easily relaxed or worse – given up and become an Al Bundy type character, cynically moping through life. But he didn’t. For whatever demons he no doubtably internally suffered – He kept hustling. He continued serving the town of Lynbrook as an active and involved Mayor. He kept his nihilistic humorist view of life always on an upbeat tone that satirized the cynical instead of embracing its darkest parts. The man had bittersweetness to his outlook but didn’t let it metastasize into selfishness or self destruction and as a person with a similar outlook on the theater of Life, it’s a lesson I’ll always carry with me.

There would have never really been any way I could have ever communicated this to Mr Hendrick while he was alive I guess, but I’m still sad I’ll never be able to in the future. It’s been awhile since I saw him in person last as Johnnys wedding was a family and local-friends only affair but the blessing of my detailed memory allows me to revisit with specificity and clarity a lot of the moments I had experienced with him.

It’s a loss that I won’t get to riff with him anymore or bounce goofy thoughts off of him or even just hear him say “HI RICHID” in a theatrically gravely voice ever again. I am crestfallen that his grandkids won’t have his razor wit keeping them on their toes and so sad for my friends Johnny and Billy whom he left behind.

God Bless William Hendrick. A man I’m glad I knew.

 

 


This Article posted on the Richardland Life Journal, not to be confused with the satirical/humor blog located @ richardland.com proper.

Breakfast for Lunch, Kills…

Think twice before you go against Nature and God and decide that you can just have your bacon&eggs and eat it too.

24 hours after going out to an afternoon breakfast with Tisch – she’s posting to social media laid up in the Emergency Room from some kind of virus that I googled and then got immediately bored with because it wasn’t about me or whatever.

 

breakfast for lunch

Also don’t forget that “that which doesn’t kill us, only makes us hurt in the meantime, adding more gratuitous setback to an already ultimately meaningless existence in a cruel and disorderly world of relentless suffering that weakens our body and spirit on this conveyor belt to nothingness where we’ll all be forgotten anyway”. Amen.

How to be my friend (in order of importance)

4 simple points:

 

Be loyal

Be good

Be honest

Have good improving skills

 

That’s all I look for in acquiring and keeping around people I treat and refer to as friends.

 

Loyalty above all… What is a friend if it’s not loyal? A non-loyal associate is just “someone you know”, not a friend. A friend sticks with you. A friend never abandons. A friend is there looking out for you.

 

Goodness is needed so I can like you… if you’re not good (meaning: you strive to be and do good. not that you’re without flaw) then I’m uninterested.

 

Honesty could be argued is a sub-set of goodness but it isn’t really. Goodness is about net positive/negative impact and it isn’t difficult to lie a lot and still have a lot of neutral effect. So since all lies aren’t destructive, anti-lying can’t be a sub-set of goodness. This includes lying to yourself. I can’t be constantly seeing through a persons self-delusions and/or fibs they tell to obfuscate as ways to avoid petty embarrassment or anything similar.

 

Evolution is important because I am obsessed with it myself and thus I can’t help but see ways my surroundings can likewise improve. If you are stagnant in your evolution then you’re going to hate me and i’m going to not respect you. Lets improve together, not settle.

 

Let’s be friends.

What it takes to achieve my attention

ENTRY LEVEL
Be pretty.

The end.

I’ll give you a minute. Not a whole lot more though, so be careful. But that’s all you need for initial attention.

Don’t fail this audition.

OPENING STAGE
To get my real attention, a girl has to line up physical attraction with emotional/psychological attraction, with a click of personalities just to get to an entry stage of consideration.

Typically only one of those is common and 2 is rare, so essentially my opening stage is three levels deep.

If you slam all three then you’re already in an elite class. Congratulations!

PHASE 2
Even with 2 or all 3 of those rare matches, in order to escalate to a phase 2 of consideration, they still have to obsessively like me for my unique quirky attributes (not just the mainstream ones that its easy for anyone to fawn over me for), live a life I find admirable or can otherwise respect, have a talent or area of knowledge I either don’t have or am impressed that they have, and have some kind of life drive and ambition (they don’t need to have it totally figured out yet but the drive to thrive and not just survive must be there).

PHASE 2.5
If you have passed phase 2 then you’ve basically achieved the highest levels possible with me because I like you. Liking you doesn’t mean I can stand you in long stretches though so if you expect to talk to me frequently (like more than a few times a week or, god forbid, daily) then I need your brain not just respectable but sharp. It’s not enough to just get along together for me to spend a lot of time with you. I need your mind to be active and thoughtful and thirsty for knowledge and learning. You don’t have to understand all my esoteric references and be on my level of problem solving analysis (mostly because that’s not possible) but you need need to be a worthy opponent and partner as far as intellect. Not knowledge. Knowledge is how many facts you know. I don’t care if you don’t know an encyclopedias worth of info (though that would impress me) – I care about how you approach problems and whether you are thoughtful and observant or dense to the world around you.

3RD DEGREE
Now it’s really getting serious…
To reach a Richardland 3rd degree, the first two levels must be supplemented by a combination of unique and impressive preexisting life standards on their permanent record that value them highly as a prize I can not just like but be proud to achieve. I can get along with and appreciate a girl with the above criteria but in order for me to get excited about a girl being mine and submit myself to be fully hers (and actually be happy about it), she needs to have a pre existing record that is uncommon, classy, and admirable. She has to have, to some degree, been living her life in preparation for someone or something as awesome as what I bring to the table. This is especially important in her record of choosing men. If it’s too loose or appears random, I’m not interested in the 3rd degree. Don’t even try.

But if her record of boyfriends is stringent, there are no recent drunken hookups or casual relationships of pure convenience – if it’s provable in your life choices that you know what you are worth and you want me – then congratulations baby: I love you. You won the game. And you know it’s real cuz this blog verified exactly what I look for.

 

 

So that should answer your question on why you don’t see a lot of girls getting my attention in public or private: none of you are good enough. But hopefully this list will inspire some of you to be some day. Not necessarily for me but for you. For you to find your own Richards you need to have at least some kind of establishment of who you are and what makes you special and have an idea of what you want and are looking for. Since you’re almost positively not good enough for me: I wish you luck.