I wasn’t sure if I was feeling a little warm in the head this evening. I was a little tired, but I had gone to bed late, woke up early and gone for a jog earlier, so a little fatigue was to be expected. but then… the tickle.. I felt a god damn tickle in my throat, the likes of which.. would.. indicate i was falling ill… again. I was just frigging sick most of August. Its barely October and this is actually happening??

“Are you fkking kidding me?” I mentally shouted. “This is NOT at all fkking acceptable. You better knock this shit off RIGHT NOW or I swear to god I’m gonna exercise and work the ever loving crap out of you tomorrow. Seriously. I’m not fkking around. STOP. you are embarrassing us”. But the tickle didn’t go away. F%CK. I start to hyperventilate a little. How am I gonna keep this a secret?? The internet can’t know about this. Wheeler can’t know about this. oh god, oh god. Say this isn’t happening, say this is NOT fkking happening right now…

Do I take an Advil? a Benadryl? a Nyquil? a quail quill on a window sill in a windmill on a hill with Jack & Jill ? — DAMMIT Richard, this is no time for irreverent though clever alliteration. You can NOT be getting sick this close to previously being sick. you can NOT NOT NOT.

But my eyes are misting slightly. I’m coughing to relieve the tickle in what feels to be my nasal passage. oh God… this is happening… 🙁 nooooo.

And then it happened…

I coughed extra hard and dislodged a quarter of a square of Cinnamon Toast Crunch that had found itself in the wrong pipe during my post-dinner inhaling of a salad bowl portion of the General Mills breakfast cereal.

I now feel fine. thank Christ.